How I Met My Husband: Bridal Narratives at Bridal Showers in Gaborone, Senzokuhle Doreen Setume, Rosinah Mmannana Gabaitse, Mmapula D. Kebaneilwe

Abstract

The purpose of this paper is to explore how marital relations are established in Gaborone. This is done through analysing narratives at bridal showers. One of the most entertaining moments during any bridal shower is when the bride-to-be is expected to narrate how she met her partner. The researchers carried out a qualitative study where in-depth interviews and participatory observations where the key data collecting instruments. A total of 13 bridal showers in Gaborone were attended and bridal shower narratives compiled. The following are important findings of the study: narratives can be used to understand the meaning that the brides create about the formation of their relationship; there is evidence of a shift from traditional Setswana perspectives of relation formation to modern ways of courtship – a paradox between modernity and the apparent conformity to the traditional perceptions that a man must always initiate the formation of a relationship. Bridal shower narratives in Gaborone further demonstrate the importance of love before marriage and personal choice in partner/spouse selection. The paper further concludes, consistent with the findings of Oubuch, Veroff & Holmberg (1993), that each narrative presents a story making process, style and content of storytelling. The study recommends that future studies collect groom-to-be stag party narratives for comparison.